Blue Eyes
by Selena92
Summary: When Gibbs is injured in a car crash, it's up to Tony to keep him together. Unbetaed and we're not native speakers. We don't own NCIS and make no profit. Just playing around. Please rate and review.
1. Chapter 1 Bad News

AN: Would we be writing F A Nfiction if NCIS belonged to us? 'sides, if it did, quite a few people wouldn't have died. (Shannon, Kelly, Kate, Eli, Jenny...do we need to go on?)

WARNING: revised!

**Chapter 1 Bad News**

„Boss is late" Tony commented, trying to sound unconcerned while in reality all his instincts were screaming at him that something was terribly wrong. Though Gibbs had, on occasion, been late, he'd never made a habit of it. Plus, he had swung by at the man's home this morning to find his car gone. A gasp made him turn around to look at McGee, who was staring in shock at the often neglected ZNN screen behind Tony, which showed the scene of a car crash a few blocks away from the Navy Yard.  
„Oh no!" Ziva gave a strangled sound of distress as a close up of a very familiar face was shown on the screen.  
„Boss" Tony's knees felt weak. This couldn't be happening.

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There was no sound except for the hum of the machines hooked to the still form lying in the bed and Abby's soft sniffling as she sat in the chair next to the bed, staring at Gibbs. Tony, McGee and Ziva were worriedly watching, their attention shifting between the door, Abby and Gibbs.  
„Where the hell is Ducky?" Tony growled, resuming his agitated pacing.  
„He's trying to get some information on Gibbs' condition, Tony" Ziva replied, narrowing her eyes at Tony, „Could you PLEASE stop that!".  
„Sorry, it's just..." Tony started to explain, not really knowing what it was he wanted to say exactly.

The door opened, admitting one of the doctors and Ducky, who McGee greeted enthusiastically, bringing Tony up short, who whirled around, grabbing Ducky by the shoulders in desperation.  
„Tell me he's not dying."  
„Agent DiNozzo!" The man accompanying Ducky exclaimed, raising his hands in a placating gesture. Tony shot him a glare, then refocused on Ducky, who swept his eyes over their group, sighing.  
„He'll be fine. He was lucky." The ME finally said.  
„You call that..." Tony haphazardly pointed at Gibbs', „lucky?"  
„Compared to what could have happened, yes. Extremely lucky. Jethro suffered multiple bruises on his left side where he slammed into the door of his car. He also might have suffered a concussion but we don't know that yet".  
„But he's not gonna forget us, right? I mean like the last time. He's not going to run away again.." Abby's voice shook.  
„Abby.." McGee said, interrupting her monologue and with a wounded cry, she jumped into his arms. McGee held her close, looking somberly at the others.  
„That's not gonna happen." Tony announced, voice shaky.  
„I **won't** let him."

„What about the other driver?" Ziva asked suddenly, her eyes on the doctor, ignoring Tony's incredulous look.  
„I shouldn't be telling you this but...She died in surgery a few minutes ago." The doctor who had come in with Ducky shut his phone, looking at them all somberly.  
„The child?" Ducky asked.  
„What child?" Ziva interrupted, confused.  
„She has six-month old son. He's got few bruises, but nothing to worry about." The doctor answered them both.

„Who's going to take care of him now?" Ducky asked.  
„We're searching for relatives."  
"Good luck." Ducky said.  
"Well, since you guys are federal agents, do you know what exactly happened?" The doctor asked then.

Tony, Ziva and McGee exchanged glances.  
„He'd want us to find out." Ziva said, hesitantly. Tony clenched his fists, looking at Ducky, who nodded at him.  
„I'll call if something changes." Tony nodded, sighing, then clapped his hands, trying to sound cheerful.

"Come on guy's, we've got a case to solve." Abby looked up, tensing.  
„Are you serious?" she demanded, eyes red and puffy from crying.  
„Abs..."  
„No! We can't leave now!"

„Abigail. Jethro's not going anywhere right now. And Ziva is right, he'd want you to find out what exactly happened." Ducky said, placing a hand on her shoulder.  
„But..."  
„The doctor's right, Miss. There's nothing you can do for Gibbs right now" The other doctor said calmly.  
„Special Agent Gibbs. And don't patronize me" Abby hissed, narrowing her eyes at him. Both Tony and McGee winced.

„Abby..." Tony began.  
„Okay, fine." Abby conceded finally, huffing. She turned around facing Tony, McGee and Ziva.

„Okay. Abs, we need a reconstruction of the accident. McGee, you help her. See if you can find some video feeds on the accident. Use your special skills if neccessary. Ziva, talk to the witnesses and see what the cops missed." Ziva nodded, immediately leaving.

„And what are you going to do?" McGee asked slightly annoyed.

„I'm gonna talk to the police chief, find out what they got by now." Before he could do anything else, his phone rang. He looked at the screen, groaning in annoyance.

"It's Vance." He answered McGee's questioning look. "And what are you still doing here anyway?"

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„It was awe...I mean...horrible- like some movie." A young man was saying excitedly. Ziva grimaced, nodding at him to go on. He was a witness after all- even though he didn't seem to know much. A pity there was a rule against shooting annoying guys who tried to make themselves more important than they really were.

„So what exactly did you see?" She tried to get him back on track.

„I went across the street. Just wanted to get some coffee, like every morning. I work at an office. Two blocks from here. So I always come by the café over there to get some coffee first..." Ziva shot him one of her impassive stares, her hand straying to her weapon, hiding a smirk as he paled. Hurriedly, he went on.  
„Then I heard a crash. I turned around and saw that guy's car spinning around straight into the oncoming traffic, hitting that other car. Next thing I know is that the cops arrive".  
„So you didn't call them?" She'd been right, the guy had been a waste of her time.  
„No, I was too shocked..."

„I called them", a young woman said. She backed up a bit, as Ziva turned her attention to her, eying Ziva's gun. Ziva made an effort to look innocent, giving the woman an encouraging smile with just a hint of impatience behind it. The woman paled.  
„I stood by the traffic light when I saw the accident. I called 911 immediately".  
„Did you see what happened?" Ziva asked.  
„The woman in the blue mini missed the red light, I think".  
„You think?" Ziva prompted, eyebrow twitching slightly, acutely aware of one of the younger police officers on scene checking her out.  
"I was typing a text to my boyfriend, waiting for the green light. I..., I looked up when I heard the honk and saw the mini crush..., crushing into the other car. At first I was totally like 'Oh my god, what happened'. When I realised...".  
„You called the ambulance" Ziva interrupted her. The woman nodded. Ziva shot her a tight smile.  
„Thank you. If you remember something else, contact me." Ziva turned around and walked to the ambulance where the third driver was sitting being questioned by the police.

„Honestly, I have no clue what happened. I was just driving.. I heard a honk and then this guy crashed into me!"  
„Sir, could you please calm down" The cop placated. He was clearly nervous, obviously a newbie. He turned towards Ziva.  
„He didn't see what happened", he said just as Ziva opened her mouth,  
„And it doesn't seem like he could give any useful information right now".  
„I see" Ziva stated. „Are you going to question him later?"

„Of course. But why are you investigating?"  
„Because he was a NCIS agent as well."  
„But the woman was a civilian. And it was just an accident. And the chief said you NCIS guys shouldn't be here".  
Ziva narrowed her eyes „I..." she started but then her phone rang.

„Yes, Tony?...Yes, I did. … But why can't yo tell me on the ph... Okay, fine!..I'll be there in 10." She snapped, ending the call. Then she made her way back to the Navy Yard.

„What have you got, Abs" Tony called out as he entered the lab. Hopefully, she had gotten something, because the police chief had been most uncooperative.  
„A headache and I wanna kill that guy up there!"  
„Meaning?"

„From what I could reconstruct, this was merely an accident. Brakes were defective. There's been no sabotage- and the only person who could be blamed had the gall to die before-" He raised his brows at her.  
„I'm sorry. Why is it always him, Tony?" Tony hugged her, calling over to McGee, who was in the inner part of Abby's lab, hacking into the files of the traffic authority.

„What have you got Mc-"  
„Tony! How dare you call me in the middle of an interrogation?" Ziva had arrived. And she was pissed.  
„Vance. We're not allowed to work this case."  
„And you're listening to him because...?"  
„SecNav's here. In Vance's office. And who says I'm listening to him? McGee!"  
„They've updated their security since last time, but I'm in." They all gathered around the computer and McGee started the video.  
„Stop there, McHacker." Tony said, pointing at the screen. McGee stopped the feed, zooming in.  
The screen showed the woman completely absorbed with the baby, ignoring the traffic around her.  
Tony's cell rang.

„It's Ducky. You're on speaker, Duckman" He announced. Everyone gathered around him.  
„Jethro's awake."

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~FIN...just kidding :P

Rate and Review? *puppydog eyes*


	2. Chapter 2 Confusion

**AN: No, we still don't own NCIS (what a pity) **

**Thank you guys sooooo much. I couldn't believe it first: Over 500 Viewers within the first 24 hours, you made both of us so incredibly happy ;)**

**Thanks to all of you who are following this story and added this story as a favorite. And many thanks to Gloworm41 for reviewing.**

**Chapter 2 Confusion**

„_It's Ducky. You're on speaker, Duckman" He announced. Everyone gathered around him.  
„Jethro's awake."_

When the team arrived at Bethesda a while later, Ducky was waiting for them in front of Gibbs room.

"What're ya doing out here, Duckman?" Tony asked, the cheerfulness having returned to his voice since he had learned that Gibbs was awake.

"And why are you blocking the door?" Abby added loudly, making Ducky wince.

"Shh. Be quiet. Jethro's just fallen asleep again." He informed them, waving his hands in a 'be-quiet' fashion. Abby pouted at him.

"But we want to see him." Ducky nodded.

"Go ahead. Just...be silent about it, all right? He needs his sleep." With that, he opened the door, his eyebrows rising in surprise as Abby stopped him, her whole body tense.

"Ducky...he" she swallowed hard, "he does remember you...us, right?" She whispered. All eyes fell on Ducky, who nodded, closing the door again as he faced them.

"He actually asked me whether you'd been hurt as well, was rather adamant about it all. Took me and his good doctor awhile to convince him that you were just fine." At the their confused looks, he elaborated.

"Jethro has no memory of the accident. Not unusual with head trauma and the memory of the crash may never fully return but apart from that, he remembers everything, right down to today's date. He does have a concussion though. That's actually the main reason he's asleep right now. The pain killers made him sleepy. He wanted to wait for you all, but he obviously lost that fight."

"Sweet." Tony commented, shrugging as the others shot him disbelieving looks.

"What? It is...kinda" He defended, feeling his face flush in embarrassment. McGee chuckled.

"Yeah, well, when you think of Gibbs, the term 'sweet' usually doesn't come to mind- ow, Abs!" McGee went on, glaring at Abby in mock hurt.

"Gibbs is the sweetest man on earth!" She informed them, glaring them all down. Tony laughed and even Ziva hid an amused grin.

"What?"

"Well, to you, he may be, but to us...he's more a, uhm, loving bastard if anything." McGee explained, taking care to remain out of Abby's reach. She pouted at him, but before she could reply, Ducky decided to run interference.

"Abigail, we all know Jethro has a soft side, even though he may show it sparingly. But didn't you want to visit him, instead of talking?" As if on cue, a raspy voice drifted through the door, making them all jump.

"Are you going to continue hovering out there, or do you plan on actually coming in?" There was a distinct note of irritation in the words and they all looked at each other, then filed obediently into the room.

Gibbs was sitting up in his bed, arms crossed and glaring at the sheets, clearly unhappy about where he was. Once they entered, his focus shifted to Ducky, pinning him with an intense stare.

"When can I go home?" Ducky sighed exasperatedly, mouthing 'he's been asking this since about five minutes after he first woke' at Tony, who had to turn away to hide his grin.

"DiNozzo!"

"Yeah, Boss?" Immediately, he turned back around, inwardly dressing himself down. Of course Gibbs would notice. But to his slight surprise and immense relief, Gibbs didn't seem to have noticed, or if he had, he didn't act upon it.

"Report!"

"Yeah, uhm... you know you've been in an accident, right? I mean, you don't _know _know, of course, but yeah-"

"DiNozzo!"

"Getting to it, boss! Well, we've found out that the woman who caused the crash went by the name Mary Westham..."

Gibbs expression fell slack, his eyes glazing over as the name brought him back to a time both painful and wonderful. Then, a sharp spike of pain went through his head and with a groan, he grabbed at it, closing his eyes as memories invaded his mind.

_He took another sip of his coffee, fumbling with the radio as he idly waited for the traffic light to turn green. It was looking to be another calm day at work. He wondered whether Ziva would finally come clean about her new sweetheart, chuckling as he imagined Tony's reaction. He himself had run a check on the guy, of course, just in case- but the young man was all right. Quite a good fit, actually. Though he'd have another thing coming if he thought he could just go up and marry her without asking him. Gibbs shook his head, wondering about his reflective mood- and Tim...would he confess to Abby today, or would he need him to push him in the right direction? And Abby...would she accept Tim's advances? He was rather hoping she would- they fit together quite nicely. The lights switched to green and he hit the gas. Not a second later, everything descended into chaos, time stretching while at the same time speeding up. A familiar blue mini rushing towards him- his own car's tires protesting with a loud screech as he tried to stop the inevitable, dim cries in the distance, someone calling his name, a lurch as the mini impacted with his car, a sharp pain at his head, then darkness..._

...and suddenly, Gibbs found himself back in his hospital room, hunched over, with his head in his hands, breathing as if he'd just run a marathon.

"Jethro! Get someone here, fast!" Ducky.

"No!" He groaned out, unable to suppress a shiver. His stomach was roiling and he took deep breaths, unwilling to give in to the urge to puke his guts out. To his relief, his traitorous stomach settled.

"Are you sure, Jethro?"

"I'm sure" He replied, more firm this time and barely resisted as he felt his head being raised gently.

"Look at me" He blinked a few times and suddenly Ducky's face came into view, very close to his. He drew back, regretting the motion almost instantly as another spike of pain shot through his skull.

"Here, take this." Ducky pressed a glass of water into his hands helping him lift it to his lips. Ducky then helped him lie back into his pillows and after a while, the pain receded. He shot a half-hearted glare at his friend. He didn't appreciate being doused with medicine like this- although the numbness was rather nice. The bed was very comfortable, too. He shook his head, forcing his eyes- when had they closed?- open.

"Gibbs?" Abby asked shakily and he turned his head to look at her, trying to give her a reassuring smile.

"Yeah, Abs?" He opened his arms in invitation. Poor girl needed a hug after the shock she just had. Stupid medication failing at just the most inopportune moment. He studiously ignored his irritation at Ducky for giving him said meds moments earlier. She moved into his arms, hesitantly placing her own around his upper body, her head resting on his chest. He squeezed her close, pressing a kiss to the crown of her head before he released her again, gently wiping at her eyes.

"I'm fine, Abs. Memory just took me by surprise, is all." Well aware of the stares boring into him, he settled back against the headboard, surveying the room silently. Ziva, Tim and Tony all wore varying looks of slack jawed surprise- probably due to his overly mushy display earlier...damn the meds- coupled with a hint of fear, most likely caused by his strong reaction to- what, exactly? He remembered Tony giving a report, then suddenly recalling an old flame of his and then...screeching tires, pain... he forced the memories back, bile rising once again. Dammit, weren't those meds supposed to stop this? He shook his head.

His team was silent, still staring at him.

"I'm fine. Really." He reasserted then turned to Ducky.

"So, when can I go home?" He asked, putting just a bit of irritation in his voice as he crossed his arms. In all honesty, though, he was demanding this more out of a need to reassure his team the world was still turning than anything else...though he better be allowed home soon- he hated hospitals.

X-x-x-x-x-x-x

The change happened suddenly, from one moment to the next. Tony was just recounting what they'd found out about Mary Westham, complaining about the sloppy work the police had done in regards to her background (though unfortunately for the kid, there truly seemed to be no other relatives) not to mention their uncooperativeness (even though it had been sanctioned by SecNav), when Gibbs gave a groan, his breathing speeding up as he hunched into himself, head in his hands. Ducky was at the man's side in a flash, grabbing hold of his uninjured shoulder and calling out to him, then ordering one of them to get a doctor. Before McGee could leave the room and before panic could really settle in, Gibbs "no!" followed, slightly strangled, but clear enough that they all stopped what they were doing- namely, freaking out- staring at him. Colour slowly returned to Gibbs ashen face as the man allowed Ducky to hand him a glass of water with a healthy dose of pain meds, downing it without a fight, then he leaned back, closing his eyes. Moments later, he forced them open again, seeming quite irritated at himself.

"Gibbs?" Abby asked shakily and Tony watched with surprise as Gibbs proceeded to reassure her, being exceptionally tender. He couldn't help but stare. Though he was well aware that Gibbs had a soft spot for Abby, he wasn't often treated to a display of this side of his boss, the older man obviously preferring to keep his tough guy persona on. It was sweet- like he was her father. He shook his head. Again with that...somehow fitting word. He refocused on Gibbs, who seemed to have trouble keeping his thoughts together as well, suppressing the sudden urge to turn tail as the man's blue eyes suddenly fixed him with an intense 'you know you've got no chance so you better come clean now' stare for a moment, then swept over McGee and Ziva as well.

"I'm fine. Really." He said firmly and Tony would have believed it even, were it not for the barely perceptive telltale slump of the older man's posture.

'Sure you are' He thought, hiding a small smile.

"So, when can I go home?" Tony felt himself relax as he recognized the note of irritation in Gibbs voice.

"Uhm, no offence boss, but I don't think you should..." McGee trailed off, paling, as Gibbs irritated stare bored into him. Tony winced in sympathy.

"I...uhm...nothing boss. Was just going to check on something...come on, Abs." And with that, McGee left the room, pulling a confused Abby with him. Ducky and Tony exchanged a bemused glance. The quiet was interrupted by Ducky's cell. Looking at the screen, he said

"It's Jimmy. I'm going to put him on speaker."

"Dr. Mallard! Thank god I was able to reach you- is Agent Gibbs all right?"

"Yes, Palmer, I'm fine. How's the vacation?"

"Uh, hi Agent Gibbs. I'm glad you're awake. Do you guys need-"

"No. There's no case. You're _not _going to cut short your well-deserved vacation, you hear me?" Gibbs voice was sharp, brooking no argument. On the other end of the line, it was quiet, Jimmy obviously working the words through.

"If you're sure. But you'll watch over him, right Tony?"

"Palmer!"

"Sorry, sir, just making sure. Tony?"

"You got it, gremlin." Tony replied, fighting hard to keep his composure and avoiding Gibbs eyes.

"How come you knew I was here anyway?" He added as an afterthought. Jimmy laughed.

"You're kidding, right? _Where_ else would you be? Nine times out of ten, you're where he is. Especially when he's hurt." Tony was silent.

"Well, I'm the man's second. What d'you expect?" He defended after a while.

"You _do_ know I'm here DiNozzo, don't you?" Gibbs voice had a warning note to it, but when Tony looked, his eyes were laughing, mouth quirked into one of his half-smirks. Tony allowed himself to smile back, mouthing 'Sorry, Boss.' Gibbs glared at him, then pouted. Tony stared. Gibbs was acting strange and he wasn't quite sure whether to be worried or not. One thing was for sure though, he wouldn't leave the older man's side until he was his usual bastard self again. Although this sweet, vulnerable side was nice, too, in a way.

"Right. Well, uh...if you really don't need my help then..."

"We don't." Gibbs affirmed sharply, then he added, voice softening, "the thought is appreciated though. Enjoy your vacation." He stifled a yawn. Ducky and Tony exchanged a glance.

"Okay. Get well soon."

"Give my greetings to Breena." Gibbs was visibly fighting against sleep, his exhaustion suddenly evident.

"Thanks. You, uhm...enjoy your time. Bye." With that, Jimmy cut the call. Gibbs dragged a hand down his face, rubbing at his eyes. Tony raised an eyebrow at Ducky, who merely shrugged, then came forward to pull Gibbs into a hug.

"Well then, Jethro, I'll leave you in the capable hands of Anthony here. Do be a dear and give him no trouble, all right?"

"Duck!" Gibbs growled after the older man's retreating back, much to Tony's secret amusement.

"DiNozzo, come help me for a sec." Once he was close enough, seating himself in the chair at the older man's bedside, Gibbs hand flashed out- lightening fast- delivering a head slap.

"That was for laughing." He said, then fell back into his pillows, his body relaxing into sleep so fast Tony was having trouble keeping up with it. Grinning and rubbing the back of his head, he settled in for a long night. There was nowhere he'd rather be.

Tony was just slipping into a light doze, when Gibbs started to toss in the bed, his eyes moving under their lids, as his breathing sped up. Just as Tony reached out a hand to try and wake the older man who was obviously having a nightmare, Gibbs jerked awake, blue eyes glazed and unfocussed.

"Bucket..." He groaned and Tony was just fast enough to grab said bucket and thrust it underneath the older man's head before Gibbs was violently sick into it, upper body shaking with the force of his heaving. Tony took hold of the man's shoulders in support, patiently waiting for the episode to pass. When it did, Gibbs sagged forward against him, tremors running through his body as he took deep breaths to calm himself. Automatically, Tony's arms came up and around him, one hand rubbing circles upon the older man's back, the other carding through the older man's sweat-soaked hair in an attempt to comfort him. To the younger man's utter surprise, it seemed to work. They stayed like that for a while, until Gibbs gently pulled away with a sigh, refusing to look at Tony, who said nothing, merely helping the other man to lie back down again and pulling the sheets up to his chin. Gibbs was so exhausted that he didn't even glare at Tony's fussing. In no time at all, he'd fallen back to sleep once again. Tony didn't remind him that he was still loosely holding onto his shirt as if he was a child- clearly Gibbs needed the contact and far be it for him to deny it, especially after all the times the man had comforted him, or simply been there. It felt nice to be able to comfort his friend this time around. He settled back into his chair, watching his boss attentively. The next time, he was going to catch the nightmare before it could fully form. The night went on like that, with Gibbs waking and being sick and Tony offering comfort, which Gibbs seemed to accept, each time staying longer in his SFAs embrace, until finally, in the early morning hours, he fell asleep against him, hands loosely fisting in the younger man's shirt. When Tony tried to dislodge and return him to the bed, the older man snuggled even closer, refusing to let go. Bemused, Tony finally relented and simply settled upon the bed, shifting the smaller man in his arms so he would be more comfortable as he himself leant against the headboard. He was planning on staying awake, guarding Gibbs' sleep, but before long, he fell asleep as well, exhaustion pulling him under. They didn't wake until the morning nurse came in, letting out an indignant complaint about 'visitors not allowed in patients beds-and why are you here anyway?'. They separated rather reluctantly, a sleepy Gibbs even giving a soft whine of complaint. The nurse didn't stay long, but she had effectively killed the comfortable, easy mood. An uncomfortable silence settled in the room, neither man looking at the other.

"You got nothing to do, DiNozzo?" Gibbs finally asked gruffly. Tony looked at his boss, surprised to see a faint tinge of pink scattered on the older man's cheeks. Was Gibbs _blushing_? He looked a lot younger like that- and vulnerable. Tony shook his head at himself. It was most likely a fever, nothing more. He reached out to check, eyes widening in surprise as Gibbs hand snapped out, stopping his hand before it made contact. Blue eyes met his and they stared for a while at each other, unable to look away, then Gibbs shook his head, blinking and released Tony's hand.

"I'm fine."

"I know, but I'll still be on your six." Gibbs nodded at him, then settled back against his pillows, grimacing. Immediately, Tony's protective instincts fired up.

"Are you all right?"

"Yeah...just not as comfortable as before..." Gibbs murmured, obviously not really conscious of what he was saying then he sighed, closing his eyes once again and thus missing Tony's startled and at the same time indulgent smile.

"I'll be there if you need me, boss." He reassured and smiled as his only response were deep, even breaths.

-x-

Tony wasn't surprised to find the hospital bed empty when he returned from the bathroom. It had only been a matter of time till the older man would try this. He was actually surprised that it hadn't happened sooner. After all, it was the third day of Gibbs hospital stay. He strode towards the door, half-hoping to find his boss there. Of course, the older man was long gone.


	3. Chapter 3 Memories

To all reviewers. We apologize for the confusion in chapter 2- which is revised now. We hadn't meant to be quite this explicit. This fanfic isn't going to be slash, but rather is supposed to be a very close friendship between Tony and Gibbs, with Tony supporting Gibbs until he is well again. Gibbs is suffering from post-concussion syndrome, which is why he's so cuddly and in need of a few hugs. However, Tony only meant to offer comfort by reciprocating, nothing more. We were a bit influenced by a few Tibbs stories we've read when writing the chapter but, as said before, it was unintentional.

To all those who like slash- we're sorry and hope you're still going to enjoy this story.

To everyone else- We hope you can forgive us our error and stay with us :-)

Again, this will NOT be slash.

And also sorry for not updating this long. We were both having a severe case of writers block- which still doesn't seem to be quite through with us, unfortunately. So we can make no promises when we'll update next. But we are NOT abandoning this story :-)

Chapter 3- Memories

"Tony!" Ziva called from down the hall to his right and he whirled around to face her. She was accompanied by the rest of the team, even, Tony was surprised to see, Vance, who now looked at him with a raised eyebrow. Ducky took in Tony's slightly panicked state and grinned.

"Let me guess- Jethro's flown the nest?" Vance's eyes narrowed.

"Uh..." Tony floundered, rubbing the back of his head, "I was perhaps a minute away, honest!"

"Then why are you here? Far as I know he's suffering from a concussion and personality change- he could hurt himself." Vance asked.

"Well...if you've not seen him, then I guess he's... Maybe he took the stairs".

"You think he's trying to get out of the hospital?" McGee asked.

"Well, he **hates** hospitals".

"I'll check the entrance" Ziva said, "I don't think he'd get very far in his condition".

"Ok, McGee, check the the stairs, Ducky and I'll search this floor" Tony said.

A few minutes later, Ziva called him. "I haven't found him, and there were no taxis nearby when we came."

"Ok, so he's still in the hospital, thanks Ziva." Tony had just hung up when McGee came back and told him that the stairs were empty as well.

Ducky came back as well, telling that the nurses hadn't seen Gibbs as well. At this moment Gibbs entered the corridor.

"Jethro!", Ducky called "There you are. Thank god, we were already looking for you. You shouldn't walk aound in your condition. We were quite worried about you."

"I just wanted to take a little walk, sorry I worried you." Gibbs said. "Everyone raised an eyebrow but only Vance commented "Okay, even I know enough to realise that you must be quite beside yourself if you're apologizing." Gibbs ignored him as he lead the way back into his room, settling into his bed as the others followed him in, exchanging worried glances.

They were bantering back and forth, talking about their days and how they missed their boss, when they noticed that Gibbs had slumped in his bed, dropping off to sleep in the short lull in their conversation. Being as quiet as they could, they left the room, leaving Vance in charge of watching over Gibbs for a while. He had put his foot down, all but ordering Tony to go home and rest for a bit. Now he was sitting in one of the visitor chairs, watching Gibbs' sleep. The man seemed to be dreaming, his eyes moving beneath their lids and Vance couldn't help but smile when the man shifted onto his side, mumbling in his sleep. For a moment, the mans eyes fluttered, but he didn't wake up, body limp against the pillows.

Gibbs made sure to breathe evenly, and look for all the world that he was still asleep as he tried to assess his situation. Sometime during his teams visit, he had fallen asleep and, judging by the stillness of the room, the team had either followed him or gone home. Though it gave him a warm feeling to know that they all cared so much for him, he hoped for the latter- his plan would be so much easier to execute when there were less people to search for him. He shifted in his 'sleep', surreptously feeling for the card he had stolen from the locker in the nurse's room. It's absence would not be noticed until a few days later, since it belonged to a nurse that was currently taking a leave of absence. Settling down again with a small mumble he opened his eyes a small slit, closing them at once when he noticed Vance sitting in the chair he had dubbed 'Tony's chair' in his head. Well, at least it was only one person- he hadn't expected to be left on his own anyway. His chance to get away would come and soon, he hoped, because lying there pretending to sleep was _very_ boring. If he was not careful, he would fall asleep again for real. Luck was on his side though, because a few minutes later Vance stood, heading into the bathroom. In no time at all, Gibbs had slipped out of bed and left the room, hurrying up the corridor to the staff elevator. He heaved a relieved sigh when the doors finally closed.

Vance returned to the room only to find it empty. Cursing under his breath, he strode to the door, throwing it open. He had half hoped that the other man was still there, but of course, he was not. Why hadn't he thought to handcuff him to the damn bed while he was in the bathroom? He should have known that not having his slippers wouldn't stop Gibbs. Perhaps he'd gone into the nurse station again? He didn't hold much hope for that however, and wasn't surprised to find that Gibbs was not there. Damn, the man was fast. Vance frowned- much faster, in fact, than his patient card and previous behavior suggested.

Meanwhile, while Vance panicked and cursed him to all hells in his mind, Gibbs was slowly making his way down a dimly-lit corridor towards the hospital morgue. Entering the room, he went straigth to the cubicle where the victim was supposed to be in, slowly pulling it open. It felt like a punch to the gut when he recognized the only woman he had ever loved as he had Shannon. Dizzily, he stumbled backwards, as his breathing sped up. Again, he revisited the accident, but this time, he remembered recognizing her and desparately trying to steer his car out of her path, all the while knowing that it was useless. Why hadn't he been more careful? Why did he always end up killing people he loved? Tears started to fall as he forced himself to look into her still face again.

"I'm so sorry." He barely managed to turn away from Mary before he threw up on the floor. He shivered, pressing himself backwards against the wall as he tried to keep himself from panicking. Fumbling frantically, he pulled out his cell, speed-dialling Tony's number. It felt like an eternity passed until Tony picked up.

"Boss?"

"T-tony...I-" He couldn't talk properly.

"Boss, where...re..u?" Tony's voice was full of concern, but the bad connection kept distorting his words and cutting them off. Then, the line went dead.

Tony cursed as the line disconnected before the Gibbs could answer his question. The older man had sounded really out of it and very vulnerable. Hell, the man had sounded like he was close to- or already- crying. Something bad had happened. His cell rang and, hoping it was Gibbs again, he picked up.

"Boss?"

"_DiNozzo. Gibbs vanished. Has he contacted you?"_ It was Vance.

"Dammit!"

"_Excuse me?"_

"Sorry. I'm coming." He cut off the call before Vance could answer. A mere minute later he was in his car, sirene on and speeding at a brekneck pace towards Bethesda. Tiles screeched in protest as he hit the brakes at full speed. Probably, he would have to get new ones later, but he didn't care. Rushing into the building and taking the steps two at a time up to Gibbs floor.

"I already checked the floor, but haven't found him", Vance said as soon as he saw Tony. "What exactly did he say when he called you?"

"I couldn't understand much, the line went dead, like he was...wait. What's in the basement?" He asked one of the nurses.

"Just the morgue" she answered confused. "Damm it!" Tony cursed. Vance looked at him confused. "Mary Westhams body is in the mourge of this hospital. But how the hell did he find...Anyway, I need to use that elevator." he told the nurse.

"But-"

"Now, please." He looked at Tony as if to determine the wisdom of his action, then shrugged, activating the elevator with his card. The whole way down, he kept staring at Tony. He had never felt so much discomfort going down an elevator before. Gibbs had a lot to explain.

"Thank god, here you are" Tony said as he entered the morgue. "Are you ok?"

Gibbs didn't answer which made Tony worry even more. "Gibbs, are you alright?"

"Hmmm" Gibbs was obviously deep in thought. He was leaning against the wall next to a pulled out stretcher, where Mary Westham's body laid. He was incredibly pale and shivering and the look in his eyes scared Tony- it looked almost as if all the life had been sucked from him, leaving nothing but a shell.

"Come on, boss, we need to get you warm. Let's go back." Tony said, touching the older mans shoulder. Gibbs was not quite fast enough to hide his flinch. Tony grabbed his boss' hand, helping him upright. The tremors got worse. Suddenly, Gibbs knees buckled, his eyes rolling back.

"Whoa! Boss!" Just in time, Tony caught him. Frantically, he tried to rouse him, but Gibbs didn't react. Tony cursed as he felt the older mans forehead- he was burning up. Muttering a "Sorry", he scooped his boss into his arms, carrying him out of the room and past the startled nurse, who fortunately had enough presence of mind to act fast, opening the elevator.

"Here" He shrugged out of his nurse overcoat, helping Tony to bundle Gibbs up in it.

When the elevator doors opened he saw Vance standing in front of him. Together they brought Gibbs back into his room.

Soon one of the doctors entered the room. "I heard what happened. I need to check on this patient now, please wait outside". Five minutes later he stepped outside, where he was alreday been expected by Tony and Vance who had been waiting for news impatiently.

"How is he?" Tony asked.

"Well he was put under much stress and definitly needs rest now. I gave him something for the temperature to cool down and want to keep him here under suveilance for a few more days."

"Could I stay overnight?", Tony asked. The doctor hesitated. "Alright, but do not question him before I give you clearance. I want to do some more tests tomorrow to make sure we haven't missed anything."

"I thought you already ruled out any permanent damage?" Vance asked.

"Sure but he collapsed so we want to make sure there is no further damage."

Tony had just dozed off, when a sound shook him awake. Gibbs was wrapped into his blankets, his breathing fast as he muttered something. Listening more closely, Tony realised he was begging for someones forgiveness. He placed his hand on Gibbs shoulder to shake him awake, calling the man's name.

"No, Mary!" Gibbs eyes shot open as he bolted into a sitting position. His eyes were disioriented, panic and pain warring for dominance.

"Shhhhh" Tony tried to calm him down. "It's ok, you were just having a nightmare...Wait a sec, you knew Mary Westham?"

Tbc...


End file.
